


Going Somewhere

by FollowingButterflies



Series: Win A Date'verse [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-28
Updated: 2013-05-28
Packaged: 2017-12-13 06:56:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/821358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FollowingButterflies/pseuds/FollowingButterflies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spin-off from Win A Date With Dean Winchester:<br/>A trip to California to meet Sam's girlfriend makes Dean realise what he really wants in life and how an important phone call is needed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Going Somewhere

Jolting awake with a confused grumble Dean yawned loudly and blinked several times before he realised he was in the passenger seat of the Impala, the sun high in the sky indicating that it was late morning to early afternoon. His neck was stiff as were his legs and this was no doubt because of him falling asleep in the Impala which he really needed to stop doing so often as he was probably going to become a cripple by the age of fifty. As Dean moved his neck, wincing at the loud crack,  he became more aware of the Impala around him; the car smelt like it always did, a mix of old leather and warmth, but with the slight mix of Castiel’s shower gel that Dean had used that morning during his shower.

"You know in not one of those cheesy interviews you've ever given have you mentioned that you talk in your sleep...quite frequently as well I might point out." Castiel said from the driver’s seat between humming along to the song playing through the speakers, an instrumental piece of music that Dean recognised as it was one of Castiel’s favourite pieces of music and he played it quite frequently when he was studying.

"Wha'?" Dean mumbled rubbing his eyes to try and feel more awake. His hated falling asleep when someone else was driving because he always felt so disorientated afterwards when he woke up.

"You talk quite a lot while you are asleep, it's quite endearing actually. I suppose I never realised it before because we tend to be asleep at the same time normally." Castiel said with a playful smirk as he reached to the middle of the car and picked up a large paper cup. "I stopped off to fill your baby up about five minutes ago and grabbed some coffee at the same time, here." He handed Dean the cup which was still hot and smelt faintly of hazelnut because that was Dean’s favourite kind of coffee. 

"Thanks” Dean said giving Castiel a quick smile “Oh, did you fill her up-"

"With premium gas? Yes, yes I did and I didn't just jam the gas nozzle in because your baby is a lady." Castiel cut in quickly with another smirk spreading across his face. Dean couldn't help but smile back as he sipped the paper cup of coffee slowly. Everything between them had become to feel so natural without any of the potential awkwardness Dean had felt in the past and that simple knowledge made him so happy because it was clear that things between he and Castiel could really work even if it was just to do with the small fact that Castiel knew how to fill up the Impala.

"Where are we?" Dean asked after a moment as he watched the highway go by.

"About seven hours away from Palo Alto.” That meant that Dean had been asleep for nearly six hours and part of him felt guilty for making Castiel drive for that long without anyone to talk to but then again Castiel had probably revelled in it as he could play his choice of obscure classical music without Dean looking at him like he was insane or requesting that they change the music to ACDC. “Sam is very excited about us coming and apparently Jessica slaved in the kitchen all afternoon yesterday. She made a pecan pie in honour of meeting you seeing as it is one of your favourites." Castiel said. "I spoke to Sam on the phone not too long ago to tell him whereabouts we were" he added when Dean shot him a quizzical look and the thought of Castiel talking to Sam while Dean was asleep was nice in a strange way. Dean knew that Sam liked Castiel but knowing that his brother and his boyfriend could get along effortlessly made Dean’s life just that tiny bit more stress-free.

“Um…I didn’t say anything…embarrassing when I was asleep did I?” Dean asked as he tried to recall what he had been dreaming about before he had woken up. Castiel merely gave him a large grin causing Dean to groan under his breath. “Fuck, what did I say?”

“Not a thing that made any sense.” Castiel said. “Most of it was just nonsense mumbles.” Castiel added as Dean let out a sigh of relief. “Like I said, it’s quite endearing. Gabriel used to talk in his sleep when he was about eight years old but the only thing he ever talked about was confectionery.”

“Well does nonsense beat confectionery?” Dean asked.

“Your nonsense does.” Castiel said glancing over at Dean with a sincere smile. In that moment as Dean looked at Castiel sat in the driver’s seat of his car, the sun beating down on his scruffy hair and tanned face and the damn classical piece of music that was playing, which made any moment more romantic than it really was, Dean had to admit that he really was in love with Castiel. He had known that he had been quickly falling in love with him for some time but now he knew that he loved Castiel more than he had ever loved anyone in his life outside of his family. The thought should have scared him but instead it made him feel calm. The knowledge that he truly loved Castiel made him feel as though all of this, driving to California to introduce Castiel as his boyfriend and having Castiel move to New York to him was the right thing. It was the right thing to do and that was the best feeling ever.  “What?” Castiel asked and Dean realised that he’d been staring for a few minutes.

“Nothing.” Dean said shaking his head with a smile. “I’ll take over driving at the next stop” he said simply because that seemed a more appropriate thing to say in the moment instead of ‘I love you’.

* * *

 

Sam lived in a small but spacious house that overlooked San Francisco Bay and was about a twenty-five minute drive away from Stanford’s campus. The street he lived on was quiet and not as crowded as the more popular streets that other students lived on. Apparently Sam preferred living slightly further away and closer to the Bay but he’d never really given Dean all of the reasons behind this preference but now that Dean drove into the silent street he was thankful that Sam hadn’t chosen to live closer to the campus as there were less people about and it meant that he never had to worry about photos of him appearing on the internet though, which did occasionally happen when he came to California to see Sam and they went out for the evening which was one of the reasons why the brothers normally just stayed in Sam’s apartment and watched old films.

Initially Sam had been reluctant to let Dean buy him a house but he had lost that argument fairly quickly. Dean had made it clear from day one that he would spend a majority of his earnings on his family so that meant that Sam’s tuition was paid for, no scholarships needed, and that Dean would buy him somewhere to live in California for as long as Sam was out there. After all, and Dean had been very quick to point this out as well, he had brought Jo an apartment in New York and had made sure that Bobby and Ellen were fully set up back in Lawrence so it was obvious that Dean would make sure Sam was completely set up which was why Dean paid for all his bills so the only thing Sam really had to concern himself about was making sure the refrigerator was stocked up.    

“Wow, it must be nice to live near the bay.” Castiel remarked as they drew closer to Sam’s house.

“Yeah, Sam’s balcony has a killer view of the bay. It makes a change from the view I have back in New York so it’s nice to get out here sometimes.” Dean said slowing down the Impala as he spotted where Sam lived and pulled into the driveway. Dean hadn’t even cut the engine when the front door was flung open and his brother came barrelling down the driveway with a pretty young woman with a shock of curly blonde hair in tow.

“You guys are here!” Sam said happily as both Dean and Castiel climbed out the car. Sam pulled Dean into a bone crushing hug. Literally. Dean could hear something cracking as Sam held onto him. He supposed that’s was what happened when he didn’t see his brother for over two months. “How was the drive?” Sam asked.

“It was good, I think someone enjoyed having control over the music a bit too much though” Dean said casting a look over at Castiel who just shrugged with that oh so familiar smirk of his.

“You’re an actor and the fact that you can only name one movie score composer sickens me so you needed the musical education.” Castiel said which made Sam chuckle loudly.

“Oh yes, I was treated to hearing about the complete history of both Hans Zimmer and Alan Menken during the drive here.” Dean said to Sam who was still laughing, the jerk. Dean elbowed his brother in the ribs causing Sam to groan slightly before he moved over to Castiel and out of the way of elbows.

“It’s really good to see you again Cas.” Sam said grinning at Castiel before he pulled him into a hug that, from the look on his face, was just as bone crushing as the one he had given Dean. It was a testament to how much Castiel clearly liked Sam that he allowed Sam to hug him as Castiel really was not a hugger. If he was going to live with Dean though he would have to get used to it; Winchesters hugged and it was as simple as that. “I’m glad you came out here.” Sam added before he let go of Castiel and looked over towards the smiling blonde girl. “Dean, Cas, this is my girlfriend Jessica Moore.” Sam said and it was impossible to miss the love in Sam’s voice as he said Jessica’s name and man, the way he looked at her; there was nothing but adoration. Jessica blushed for a moment as she probably heard the adoration in Sam’s voice but then she just smiled back at Sam with the same dopey like. For a split second Dean hoped that he and Castiel weren’t that sickening with their dopey looks, if they ever gave each other dopey looks that was. Then again Anna had pointed out several times that was amazing their relationship was still a secret seeing as it was so obvious to her that the two of them were in love.

“It’s good to _finally_ meet you Jessica.” Dean said as Jessica smiled broadly at him. “Sam’s been refusing to let me meet you for far too long.” Dean added while Jessica laughed at the flush creeping up Sam’s neck.

“Apparently Sam had his reasons.” Jessica said.

“Yes, I’m the charming brother while Sam inherited all the lesser qualities.” Dean said grinning.

“Dean’s also incredibly modest.” He heard Castiel say with heavy sarcasm.

“Well I was going to bring my attractive and intelligent boyfriend Castiel with me but instead I brought this sarcastic asshole.” Dean said smirking over at Castiel who just rolled his eyes.

“It’s really nice to meet you Jessica, I heard a lot about you when I first met Sam.” Castiel said giving Jessica a warm smile that was so different from his normally sarcastic one.

“Really?” Dean asked. “When?”

“In New York, Sam and I had a very nice conversation about California, Stanford and Jessica here. You were singing along to Bonnie Tyler, badly I might add, with a very drunken Jo at the time.” Castiel said before he accepted the friendly hug Jessica gave him.

“That’s sounds about right according to what Sam has told me of Dean.” Jessica said with a small laugh. “It’s really nice to meet you Castiel. When Sam told me you and Dean were dating he had nothing but nice things to say about you.”

“What did he say about me?” Dean asked smiling cockily.

“I think the words ‘Narcissistic Personality Disorder’ and ‘Egomaniacal’ were used more than once.” Jessica said grinning over at Dean.

“I really do wish I was an only child sometimes…” Dean muttered as Castiel snorted loudly along with Sam. The jerks…

* * *

Sam and Dean carried in the bags that had been brought with Dean and Castiel while Jessica talked to Castiel. It turned out that they both loved the same books and it was painfully obvious that the pair of them would talk about nothing else for most of the night. While Castiel went off with Jessica to no doubt talk about even more books in the kitchen Sam showed Dean where he and Castiel would be sleeping before grabbing a few bottles of beer heading out to the balcony that over looked the bay.

"So how is the film in Chicago going?" Sam asked as he sipped on his beer. Dean sipped on his own beer as he rested against the balcony railing and looked out towards the amazing view Sam had of the bay and nature reserve.  
  
"It's going well; it's going really well actually. The script is incredible and it's nothing like I've done before. I mean I read Cas’ stupidly worn copy of the book when Pamela told me that I got the part and it’s a tough story but I really love the direction we’re taking it with the film" Dean explained.

"So it's a far cry from those damn teen films you've done before?" Sam said between his smirks.

"If I get nominated for a damn Teen Choice Award from this then I'm going to have to wonder what kind of teens are watching the damn film. Disaffected twenty something year olds in Chicago dealing with a shitload of issues can be damn depressing to read about but it's actually making a decent enough film. However, I am never being in a film based on one of Cas’ favourite books ever again. I swear he has a small heart attack whenever I mention the smallest of things about it. He nearly blew a blood vessel when I happened to mention that one of the character’s sweaters would be green instead of red like it was in the book. After that I decided to stop telling him most details."

“So you and Cas…you…you doing good?” Sam asked raising an eyebrow questioningly.

“What?”

“You know…is your relationship doing well?” Sam asked.

“Are we having a conversation about feeling and crap like that Sam?” Dean shot back with his own eyebrow raised because he and Sam didn’t talk about stuff like that. They talked about work and school and stuff like that, they didn’t talk about relationships though mainly between Sam got pissy when Dean questioned him about his love life and Dean had never really felt right telling Sam about his own love life. Cas was the first person Dean had dated in a long time who had even met Sam.

“Well I was trying to have a conversation about feelings but like always you’re showing the emotional maturity of a rock.” Sam said shrugging.

“Thanks Sam.” Dean said sarcastically punching his brother lightly.

“I’m just asking if you and Cas are good…”

“Yeah…don’t.” Dean said snorting slightly. “Look, Cas and I are fine.”

“’Fine’? After two months you’re just ‘fine’?” Sam asked sounding concerned. Dean chugged on his beer and Sam continued to look at him quizzically.

"Cas is going to move to New York." Dean said after a moment and Sam looked at him with surprise. “When filming is over and Cas has finished at the university he’s going to come back to New York with me.” Dean added. “He’s going to live with me…”

"Really? Wow, that's big...I mean you've only been together like two months or so."

"Sam after the crap I went through to find Cas I'm not just going to lose him once I go back to New York so I asked him to move to New York. There is enough room in my apartment for him and he can do anything he wants to when he's there." Dean explained. “I’m in love with him and I’m not going to fuck around and mess that up.”

“You’re in love with him? For real?” Sam asked.

“Yes Sam, for real. I know it’s only been two months but it feels right, y’know?” Dean said. “Now are we done with the feelings talk?” he then asked.

“Um…yeah I guess so. So…Cas coming with you to New York…wow...so you’re…you’re going to tell…more people?” Sam asked and Dean knew that his brother was worried about him because even if Dean didn’t want to admit it telling the world about him and Castiel could easily change his career. It would change how people viewed him as both a person and as an actor even though it really shouldn’t.

“Yeah, yeah I’m going to tell people about me and Cas. I guess that I’ll start with Pamela because after that telling the press should be a walk in the park” Dean said

“You know, the terrifying thing is that I believe you when you say that” Sam said smiling at him before sipping on his beer. “Though if you do get splashed across even more magazines or websites than before then I’m going to start going to my classes with the biggest hoodie ever, I don’t care how much Jess takes the piss out of me.”

“Sam you are not going to class in that damn hoodie of yours and sunglasses again because you looked ridiculous and I wasn’t the only one taking the piss out of you that day.” Jessica said as she came out onto the balcony and smiled brightly at Dean.

“I really hope that there is photographic proof.” Dean said and he was delighted when Jessica nodded and he could help but smirk when Sam groaned.

“Great, just great.” Sam muttered.

"So this is where you two have been hiding." Jess said with a slight chuckle. "The food should be ready so you two can be helpful and lay the table; I've got Cas keeping an eye on the food for me." Jessica said handing cutlery over to Sam.

"I really wouldn't do that if I was you.” Dean said placing his beer back onto the table. “Cas can burn water if he puts his mind to it."

"Really?" Jess asked raising an eyebrow. 

"Oh yeah, I've witnessed him ruin cereal before. The guy has a great ass but man he cannot cook to save his life." Dean said with a warm smile as he walked back into the apartment to make sure Castiel didn't burn down the kitchen in the short space of time he'd been left by himself. When Dean walked into the kitchen Castiel was pulling a tray out the oven.

"Ow fuck" Castiel muttered as he caught his wrist on the oven door. Dean rolled his eyes and hurried over to take the towel and tray from Castiel's hands. Castiel gave him a quick smile before moving over to the sink to run his wrist under cold running water.

"Honestly we can't leave you alone for five minutes" Dean said placing the tray on top over the oven. He walked over to where Castiel was still holding his wrist under the water. “What are we going to do with you?” Dean asked with a slight chuckle as he looked down at Castiel’s wrist. Without thinking Dean picked up Castiel’s wrist and brought it to his lips to give it a quick kiss. “Better?” Dean asked.

“Better.” Castiel said before giving Dean him familiar smirk. “You know Hollywood Ken, for someone so tough you’re very soppy. First you talk about me in your sleep now you’re kissing my wrist better.”

“You told me that I said a load of nonsense.” Dean said really a hot flush creep up his neck.

“Oh you did but you also said that you loved me several times hence why I brought you coffee.” Castiel said moving closer to Dean rolling his hips slightly as he did so. Placing a hand gently on Dean’s chest he gripped the fabric of Dean’s plaid shirt and pulled closer still until their lips met. Dean sunk into the kiss and found himself gripping onto Castiel’s own shirt. Yes he might have said that he loved Castiel while asleep but fuck it, at least Castiel would know that Dean meant it even if he had been asleep at the time. Castiel brought his hands up to cup Dean’s face and they both sunk even deeper into the kiss. Dean gently pushed Castel until he was up against the nearest counter.

He moved his hands away from Castiel’s shirt until they were gripped onto the back of Castiel’s thighs. He could feel a rumble of a laugh building up in Castiel’s chest which him laugh himself. Gripping tighter onto Castiel’s thighs Dean pulled him up until Castiel was sat on top of the counter, legs either side of Dean so he could move even closer to Castiel than before.

Castiel wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist and gently left a line of kisses along Dean’s jaw which slowly became more heated until Dean couldn’t help but let out a low groan. With surprising gentleness Castiel rested his hands on the small of Dean’s back, his fingers tracing small, impalpable shapes with any exactitude. Each small touch was so simple and yet they managed to send shivers up Dean’s spine causing him to emit a quiet, strangled sigh. He felt Castiel laugh, a deep rumble from his chest, and as the laughter hit the skin on Dean’s jawline another shiver flashed through his body. Pulling Castiel’s lips to his own Dean poured all his own desire into the kiss almost begging that Castiel would understand and feel exactly the same.

A loud and irritated groan came from the doorway of the kitchen and for a brief moment Dean really did wish that he was back in Chicago, that there was no one in the kitchen but he and Castiel so he would get to act every single thought that was running through his head at the moment.

“Guys, _really_? We eat in here.” Sam said throwing a towel at the back of Dean’s head. Castiel began to chuckle, the unhelpful asshole, as he loosened his grip on Dean’s waist and rested his head against Dean’s chest, nuzzling his face into Dean’s clavicle.

“What, you’ve never had kitchen countertop sex?” Dean asked giving Sam a smirking smile before winking at his younger brother’s face that was drenched in annoyance. Sam rolled his eyes and gave Jessica an apologetic look.

“How about we get some dinner before Sam combusts from embarrassment?” Jessica said giving Dean a pleasant smile before she walked over to the oven and picked up the tray Castiel had burnt himself on before. “It’s nice to know you didn’t burn anything though” Jessica said to Castiel. “Dean mentioned your lack of skill when it comes to cooking.”

“Well there’s no point learning how to cook when I’ve got Dean and his endless need to cook.” Castiel said jumping from the counter top.

“And yet when we were kids his only culinary feat was a bowl of Lucky Charms.” Sam said.

“My palette has evolved since then.” Dean said smugly.

“Oh shut up and sit down.” Sam said but he smiled as he said it. Dean gave him another smirk and motioned for Castiel to join him outside on the balcony. They sat down at the table with Sam and Jessica following with the food.

The conversation was light; Jessica asked about what Castiel was studying at university. They were both fans of the same authors and after several minutes they were engaged in a heated about Ernest Hemingway and Mark Twain. Sam seemed surprised when Dean put his opinions into the mix but that wasn’t surprising really as Dean hardly ever read in front of Sam because of the amount of sarcastic comments he would get. Dating Castiel had also opened his eyes to countless books seeing as Castiel’s apartment was fighting a losing battle against the mountains of books Castiel owned. Dean’s own apartment in Chicago was starting to resemble a small bookstore actually thanks to Castiel leaving his books lying about all over the apartment.

As Dean sat and watched Castiel actually grin at Jessica’s comments on books and authors or Sam’s occasional stories about studying at Stanford he couldn’t help but smile himself. Castiel seemed so at ease and seeing how free he looked really did make Dean happy and made him realise just how much he loved Castiel.

The food Jessica made had been incredible. Dean had practically eaten the whole pecan pie to himself and _damn_ if Jessica hadn’t managed to make the best pecan pie Dean had eaten in a long time. Once they were back in Chicago Dean was determined to not only teach Cas to cook but to follow Jessica’s recipe perfectly. Then again having Cas anywhere near a kitchen wasn’t the greatest of ideas so maybe Dean would just have to get Jessica’s recipe to copy for himself.  

* * *

After dinner the four of them sat up talking and drinking coffee, which Jessica had made to barista quality, until the early hours of the morning. After the first coffee Dean had been convinced that Castiel was going to beg Jessica to move to Chicago just to make him coffee. The conversations flowed easily and at one point Dean had laughed so hard at the disagreement between Castiel and Jessica over several fictional characters that his stomach actually ached. In the end both Castiel and Jessica agreed to disagree while Dean continued to chuckle under his birth.

By four o’clock in the morning it was clear that Castiel was about to drop. Yes Dean had known Castiel to stay up for two days straight on nothing but cereal and coffee when he had a paper due in or when he’d been reading a particularly good book but after Cas had spent a large part of the day driving it was obvious he needed sleep even with all the caffeine he had ingested.

“Come on Grouchy McGee.” Dean said with a chuckle as Castiel yawned for the sixth time. “Time for bed” Castiel rolled his eyes as he hated it when Dean pointed out he got grumpy when he was tired but Dean really did have a point.

“One more coffee?”

“Yes because you and caffeine go so well together when you’re tired. Remember when you threw _To Kill A Mockingbird_ at me? Oh and _The Sun Also Rises_?” Dean asked with a cocked eyebrow.

“Oh come on Hollywood Ken, both of those books missed.” Castiel said. Both Jessica and Sam laughed loudly which wasn’t remotely helpful. “Oh fine.” Castiel said sighing when he saw the look Dean gave him. “Thank you for the dinner Jessica, it was amazing and if I had been able to even look at the pecan pie I’m sure it would have been delicious.”

“I’m a man who loves my pie, what can I say?” Dean said as Sam rolled his eyes.

“Thank you Castiel.” Jessica said rising from her seat and pulling Castiel into a hug. “I’m glad you enjoyed dinner and I’m so glad that we’ve finally met.” Jessica added with a bright smile. "Same to you Dean." Jessica said when she also gave Dean a hug. Sam just gave him a playful punch on the arm and made a comment about 'keeping it down' even though it was obvious by Castiel's yawns that the only thing he and Dean would be doing tonight would be sleeping. Dean gave his brother a playful punch back causing both Jessica and Castiel to roll there eyes. Dean could see a firm friendship forming between those two in the near future. 

* * *

Once they were inside the spare bedroom Castiel crashed down gracelessly onto the bed in the same way he had done when he had finally finished his ten thousand word essay on F. Scott Fitzgerald. He face was smashed against the pillow while his legs were splayed out like a starfish taking up most of the room on the bed. Dean rolled his eyes as taking up space in the bed was normally his idea.

“Shove over.” Dean muttered affectionately moving Castiel’s legs slightly. Castiel groaned for a second, looped an arm around Dean’s waist and pulled him down onto the bed next to him. “Cas you're really hot and all but your knee is digging into my leg.” Dean murmured as he rolled over a tried to shimmy Castiel’s jeans down his long legs.

“Are you trying to undress me?” Castiel muttered. "Because I'm  _really_ tired and I don't think-"

“Shush, I'm not trying to undress you for the reasons you’re thinking off.” Dean said with a smirk. “You always complain in the morning when you fall asleep in your jeans.” Dean pointed out as he finished pulling the jeans off Castiel’s legs. “If you kick me in the night I’ll make Jessica hide all the coffee.” Dean added throwing Castiel’s jeans onto the floor.  

“Shut up, stop being mean and kiss me goodnight.” Castiel mumbled sleepily.

“If I have to.” Dean said sighing. Castiel chuckled sleepily as Dean pulled him into a kiss. “Good night Cas.” He added.

“Good night Hollywood Ken” Castiel said smiling slightly before quickly falling asleep. Dean smiled to himself and quickly lay down next to Castiel and pulled the sleeping man into his arms.

* * *

Sunlight streamed through the windows of the guest bedroom and as he clung to the last few moments of sleep Dean smiled contentedly. He always forgot how much he actually liked being in California. The whole state felt so much more relaxed and clearer compared to New York City; it was a relief to be somewhere warm instead of Chicago. 

Sam's apartment was one of the things Dean was only too happy to pay for, it was spacious enough and had a light, airy feel to it compared to the claustrophobic feeling home they had grown up in as kids. Like Dean's apartment it wasn't too large but just the right size and filled with things both Dean and Sam saw as necessary like a laptop, coffee machine and a large TV with an extensive DVD collection.  The guest room that Dean always stayed in had the same homey feel to it and now having Castiel lying next to him made it feel more like home.

Castiel mumbled in his sleep and rolled over so he was face to face with Dean. His eyes were closed and the look on his face was so peaceful that it made Dean smile. He still couldn't get over his luck at finding someone that fit into his life like Castiel had done, someone who both Sam and Jo clearly adored and yes there would still be the issue of having to tell people outside of Dean's small circle about his relationship bit for the time being he wasn't going to dwell on it. He just wanted to enjoy this rate vacation with his boyfriend, Sam and Jess.

He had only been looking at Castiel for a few minutes, ok maybe ten, when Castiel mumbled something and began to stir. He moved closer to Dean until his face was buried in Dean's neck and mumbled something again. Castiel was not a morning person by any means, he normally needed about three, very large, mugs of coffee before he was even conscious so the mumbling wasn't a surprise at all and Dean was slowly beginning to understand what each different mumble meant. 

"Yes there is coffee" Dean said chuckling as he kissed the top of Castiel's head. He began to move as if to get out of bed to fetch some mugs of coffee but Castiel's arms snaked around his waist and pulled him back into that small nook that was just theirs. Castiel pulled him into a firm kiss that was surprising seeing as Castiel could barely put one foot in front of the other in the mornings. Dean sank into the kiss because the kiss was perfect, just like all their other kisses no matter how long they lasted or the reason behind the kiss. "Cas you have terrible morning breath." Dean muttered not really caring but he just liked to see that small frown on Castiel's face because it was actually ridiculously hot. 

Castiel mumbled his own variation of "Shut up" and pulled Dean back into the kiss, this time adding a touch of intensity that was not there before. Castiel moved slightly until he was gently wrapping his legs around Dean's waist and kissing a long line from Dean's lips, down his jaw and towards his collarbone. Dean’s breath hitched which seemed to satisfy Castiel by the way his thighs tighten around Dean.  
  
"Cas...I love you" Dean heard himself say and that was followed by Castiel chuckling. He pulled away and smiled at Dean.

"Good" he said his voice deep from sleep. "Now off you go for a coffee run." He added detaching himself from Dean and flipping back onto the bed with a satisfied smirk spread across his face. 

"You, Castiel Milton, will be there death of me one day." Dean muttered pulling himself out of bed and grabbing the nearest pair of pyjama bottoms out of the duffel bag he’d packed for the trip here.

"That's nice" he heard Castiel mumble sleepily. Dean rolled his eyes and plodded off to the kitchen in search of caffeine. One of the greatest things Dean had ever brought for Sam was a state of the art coffee machine very much like the one Dean had in his own apartment and now it really was going to come into good use.

Castiel had fallen back to sleep once Dean went back into the bedroom and with a small shake of his head Dean placed the mug of coffee onto the bedside table. There was no point trying to wake Castiel up unless Dean wanted a mouthful of abuse. Three weeks previous Castiel had actually thrown a book, which had missed, at Dean when he’d tried to wake Castiel up at six in the morning to see if he wanted to go for coffee with Dean before he went to start filming.

Instead of going back to bed Dean decided to head out onto the balcony to get some fresh air and enjoy the sun before he went back to Chicago. The early morning sunlight glinted off the bay and it made Dean feel pretty content though when he really thought about it Dean was content back in Chicago and knowing that Castiel would be moving with him back to New York made him feel even more content. Yes it was a big step, heck it was a huge step but Dean wanted to take that step with Castiel. He really meant it when he had told Castiel that he loved him and the sooner he could stop hiding that fact away the better even if it did fill Dean with dread thinking about people’s reactions…and by people he mainly meant Pamela. God he was going to have to talk to Pamela sooner rather than later because the longer he put this off the angrier Pamela would become. If she found out Dean had been dating Castiel for six or eight months rather than just two months then she would probably shout at him for several hours rather than just the average half an hour Dean was expecting.

Pamela picked up on the third ring and sounded more awake than Dean would have thought a person could sound in the morning. Then again Dean was convinced that Pamela never actually slept. "Hello Dean, how is filming going?” Pamela asked as soon as she picked up. “I've heard some great things from the director about you and several film magazines are all over the coverage of the film, apparently they're hoping for big things. I think they want to screen it at Sundance once it's finished and maybe even Cannes."

"Filming is going well Pamela, thanks for asking." Dean said trying to sound casual though he knew he failed at that when his voice cracked slightly.

“I’m guessing this isn’t just a social call.” Pamela said and Dean could practically hear her lips pursing as if waiting for whatever Dean was going to say to her.

“Um no, it’s not.” Dean said bracing himself.

"So was there a reason for you calling?" Pamela asked. 

"Yeah...there are a few things I need to go over with you once I've finished filming and come back to New York." Dean explained hating how his voice sounded. Seriously, did it have to crackle so much?

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that..." Pamela said sounding wary. "What's going on Dean? As far as I know things in Chicago have been going well, there were some great photos of you and some of your co-stars on the internet the other day."

"Everything in Chicago is fine Pamela, great even so don’t panic so much…” Dean said before taking a deep breath “Look Pamela, the thing is that I've...I've met someone."

"It's not Charlie Bradbury is it? A few people online have been speculating about the pair of you are-" Pamela started to ask before Dean quickly cut her off.

"No Pamela it's not Charlie, she has a girlfriend for starters." Dean said and Pamela spluttered loudly because apparently that was one thing Pamela _didn't_ know about. "Look you're not going to be happy but to be honest I really don't care because I'm happy and pretty much in love ok?"

"Ok I really don't like the sound of this Dean. What is going and who is this girl you're dating."

"It's not...his name is Castiel Milton" Dean said breathing in and waiting for the inevitable melt down from Pamela. When she was silent for several moments Dean became very nervous. "Pamela?"

"I'm sorry I think I wasn't listening...can you say that again because I'm sure I heard wrong." Pamela said with a very nervous sounding chuckle.

"You didn't.” Dean said firmly starting to find a lot more courage than he had before. “His name is Castiel Milton and we've been together since I came to Chicago for filming." Dean explained. 

"Wait...Milton...as in...Dean Winchester are you trying to tell me that you're _dating_ the _brother_ of the _Win A Date girl_?! What the _hell_ goes on in that _tiny_ head of yours Dean?! After _all_ the good work that contest did you are going to throw it _all_ away by dating the girl's _brother_? Do you have _any_ idea what the press are going to say once this gets out? Do you? _Do you_?" Pamela screamed, actually screamed, down the phone. She was clearly setting herself up for a shouting fit and so Dean simply set his phone down on the table where Sam ate breakfast. When Pamela got into yelling there was very little to stop her. Dean sat down and sipped his coffee.

Sam came outside with a mug of coffee as Pamela went into her tenth straight minute of yelling. Sam raised an eyebrow and gave Dean a questioning look as he walked over and sat down opposite Dean.

"It’s Pamela" Dean said nodding at the phone. "I might have told her about Cas and I being together." 

"How long has she been screaming at you?" Sam asked. Dean glanced down at his phone.  
  
"Nearly eleven minutes, she'll tire herself out after about fifteen minutes though." Dean said shrugging his shoulders. Pamela would most likely kill him when she next saw him but for now Dean was going to try and concentrate on something else because Pamela’s ranting really wasn’t the most important thing he had going on right now.

"I thought you were going to wait until you got back to New York to tell Pamela about Cas." Sam said before taking a gulp of his coffee. Dean sighed and took a generous sip of his own coffee.   
  
"I was going to but I'm just so sick of constantly having to hide my damn relationship.” He explained trying not to get worked up. “I mean you and Jess can just walk down the street and not care if people look at you. I hate to sound like a total girl but I wouldn’t mind walking down the road holding my boyfriend’s hand without some asshole with a camera phone sticking up it on the internet and having the whole fucking whole think they know shit about my relationship.” Dean said.

“-completely irresponsible like always and don’t even care about the career I’ve built up for you. Dean…Dean are you even there? Are you even listening to me?”

“Yes Pamela I’m listening. Look you can carry on yelling at me all you want but I’m past caring. Cas and I are happy with each other and I’m pretty sure I love him so I’m not going to end things between us just because you think it might affect my career. Maybe I’m sick of doing those cheesy films. I’m happy with the film I’m shooting at the moment and I think I’d prefer to do more independent films.” Dean said and Sam’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“Dean do you have any idea what the papers are going to say when this gets out?” Pamela asked.

“No Pamela I don’t and I couldn’t give a fuck about what they’re going to say either.” Dean said bluntly. Sam’s eyebrows rose up even more until he looked like a very surprised puppy. “Sorry about the language Pamela but it’s true. Look I’ll give you a chance to calm down and take several Valiums.”

“If you hang up on me Dean I swear to God-”

“Goodbye Pamela!” Dean said quickly hanging up and throwing his phone down onto the balcony table. “Well…that could have gone smoother.”

“I’ll go and get some breakfast; you look like you could do with it.” Sam said. “What you want?”

“Bacon, bacon and more bacon.” Dean said sighing.

“Why am I not surprised?” Sam muttered as he picked up his mug and walked back into the house. Dean pushed his phone away from him and rested his head in his arms. Pamela was going to kill him when he next saw her and it was most likely going to be very, _very_ painful. After a moment of sighing into his arms Dean became aware that someone was watching him, assuming it was Sam he carried on resting his head in his arms until he heard a familiar cough.

“Dean?” Castiel asked in a small voice. Dean raised his head and saw Castiel standing the doorway still looking incredibly sleepy despite the fact that he was holding onto his mug of coffee as if his life depended on it. Then again it was Castiel; his life did depend on caffeine. “Is everything ok?” Castiel asked walking over towards Dean and sitting down in the chair opposite him with a look of concern slowly creeping across his face.

“Yeah…no…sort of.” Dean mumbled running his hands through his hair.

“What’s happened?” Castiel asked in an anxious voice as he reached out for Dean’s hand and gripped onto it. “Dean? What’s happened?”

“I…I told Pamela…you know, about us.” Dean said.

“Oh.” Castiel said and as his face dropped Dean felt like he’d been punched in the chest. Maybe there was a better way of telling Castiel that Pamela now knew about them but clearly Dean couldn’t think of that way.

“Yeah. There was a lot of yelling and I think I might have caused her to have a small heart attack but that doesn’t really matter right now.” Dean explained hoping that Castiel wouldn’t look so fucking despondent.

“It does matter Dean, your career is important to you. We both know that I hate most of your films because to be honest they’re _terrible_ films with pointless plots but you’re good at what you do and I hate to admit it. Yes Dean I did just compliment you, you should be happy about that and revel in that. Now your career has helped you create this life you have for yourself, you’ve paid for your brother’s education and brought him this amazing house and your place in New York. You’ve set up Jo and your family for life and you’ve been able to see the world thanks to your career so Pamela is just concerned about how people will react.” Castiel said holding onto Dean’s hand even tighter.

“What, about how people will react to the fact that I’m dating a guy?” Dean asked.

“Well…yes. People are going to react to this Dean and I’m sure I can handle it…I’m just worried if you can handle it because you might not have realised this but you’re very famous.”

“Cas-”

“I’ve been thinking, since you asked me to go to New York with you, and maybe now isn’t the best time” Castiel said and Dean really did think his heart was going to give out as soon as Castiel said those words. This could not be happening right now. He’d only just told Pamela that he loved Cas, damn he’d only just told Cas that he loved him. Now was not the time for Castiel to tell him that he was rethinking moving with Dean to New York. Maybe that’s what Dean got for thinking that his life was finally starting to make some sense and falling together. Maybe he was a fool to think that he could have what he really wanted in life.

“What are you saying? Are you saying that you don’t want to come to New York with me?” Dean asked.

“That’s not what I’m saying Dean.”

“Well it sounds like it.” Dean hit back.

“I just mean that maybe now isn’t the right time, maybe once you’ve told the press and things have died down. Then I’ll come to New York.” Castiel said. Maybe that sounded ok to other people but Dean knew that if he let Castiel stay in Chicago when he went back to New York then he would go insane. He couldn’t imagine his life without Castiel now that he’d fallen into it, there was no way on earth that Dean would go back to New York without Cas, no way at all.

“Fuck it.” Dean murmured bringing Castiel’s lips to his own and trying to put all the anger threatening to bubble up inside of him into the kiss. He could feel his heart slamming against his chest with the thought that he might lose Cas even in the smallest of ways and he couldn’t stand it. “Cas I’m not going anywhere without you ok? I could take all the bullshit that the press could throw at me because I know you’ll be there with me. Fuck sake, I love you ok? I loved every single thing about you. I love how you cannot function in the morning without gallons of coffee, I love how you cannot cook to save your life so that means I get to cook for you, I love how you can sit and quote more books than any of person I’ve met and I love that look you get on your face when your favourite song is playing. I love you and I’m not going to let anyone get in the middle of that. You say that people knowing about us might affect my career well I’m telling you that I don’t care. I don’t care if people say shit about me. I do care if you’re not with me ok?” Dean said once he’d pulled away. “I can’t do any of this without you…I need you.” He added resting his forehead against Castiel’s.

“I need you too” Castiel whispered bringing his lips to meet Dean’s. “I’m sorry I said that…about New York…I just don’t want you to resent me if things go wrong.”

“Why would I resent you when you’ve done nothing wrong? The only thing you’ve ever done is be you.” Dean said. “And you’re perfect.” Dean added. Castiel laughed breathily for a moment before shaking his head.

“There you go again being sappy.” Castiel said with a weak smile.

“Well I was going to quote one of those romantic comedies I was in.” 

“If you had done that then I would have thrown you of this damn balcony, I don’t care if _I_ love _you_  or not.” Castiel said.   

"So...you'll come with with me to New York?" Dean asked.

"Yes...it was stupid to think otherwise. I think I'd go insane, or drive Anna insane, if I had to watch you leave for New York without me."

"Same...look it will be difficult to begin with, you know, while people get used to the idea of us together but I wouldn't have it any other way." Dean explained and he really meant it. It would be hard while people get used to the fact that Dean was in love with a guy but that really didn't matter because being with Castiel made him happy, it made Dean feel as though he was doing something truly worthwhile with his life. It made him feel like he was really going somewhere and he wouldn't change that for the world. 

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s Note: Jesus Christ on a bicycle I have been meaning to post this for too long but I had uni work (learning lines/acting said lines is work. I’ve refused to do any other work…I won’t go on) that needed doing so for that I apologise. 
> 
> The title of this fic comes from the track Going Somewhere from the A Single Man soundtrack. Abel Korzeniowski is one of my go-to composers for when I have writer's block. Plus A Single Man is a stupidly beautiful film and I really wish Tom Ford would direct another film.
> 
> Anyway, if this is lacking in any writing talent whatsoever that’s because I tend to end up writing on either the train early in the morning before my coffee has kicked in or at 3am when coffee is desperately needed. 
> 
> Oh and as always I'm over on tumblr if you want to bitch me out about this fic: casfallen.tumblr.com


End file.
